Funner things to do during examinations...

.... than write them.

Alright. It's been a while, something I'll lazily blame on the exams. Anyway, after a round of not-so-hot exams, I (lazily) thought of a few things that might have been funner to do in the examinations, than actually take them. Note that blindly following these suggestions MAY adversely affect your performance in the said examination. I say 'may' because, who knows, they might just help. Stranger things HAVE happened.

1. "The false alarm," one of my favorites. Once the examination starts, raise your hand in order to summon a magical invigilator (yea, those guys appear out of nowhere). When he/she shows, and asks what you want, repeat the following sentence: "Oh, nothing, I just wanted to see how long it took you to reach me. You know, in case I need you during the exam." At this point, the invigilator will probably warn you not to try to pull that sort of a stunt again. After about 5 minutes, pull that sort of a stunt again. This time the invigilator might get a tad angry and might even raise his voice. If this happens, calmly remind him "Sir, this is an exam, please keep you're voice down. We're trying to concentrate you know.... sheeeeesh." He'll walk away. Yes, I'm sure.

NOW comes the fun part, the third time. Raise your hand, and this time (most probably) multiple invigilators appear. The guy isn't even going to listen to you this time. He (and his bouncer buddies) start escorting you out of the hall. At this point, you start screaming at the top of your lungs, "but I only wanted more paper!!! honest!!" It is probably best if you actually HAVE finished your booklet and want more paper. The look on the invigilators face is well worth filling up ten pages with complete bs. Whats more, the guy has lost the respect of his peers, who probably think all he wanted was to ruin a young kids life. We all know what happens to HIM. And to think you did all that by raising your hand. Sounds fun now doesnt it?

2. "The alternate answer." This one isnt all that popular, because the results aren't apparent until.. never actually (unless you go to a school where you get your scripts back, then this might be fun). This "thing to do" is rather simple. Just write something that is not related to the question. For example, when you are asked to calculate the relative velocity of a moving collar in a rotating frame, write a 2000 word essay on "why calculators, and not dogs, are man's best friend". You answer might include and display crisp logic, perfect syntax and command over grammar, and an extensive vocabulary. After all, exams are where you show off what you've learnt, right?

On a related note, remember that guy who wrote that silly essay on 'courage,' and got into that silly university (its probably is a myth, but still). "This is courage" are the three words that he wrote on that piece of paper; after which he proceeded to leave the rest of the paper blank. Man, what a brilliant piece of work; what amazing wordplay, what superlative mastery ofthe English language, what brains it must have taken to come up with something so marvellous, somethign unsurpassed in the history of essay writing, something that would put John Donne to shame, and make him ask himself "can I ever really call myslef a writer again?". And that "institute of higher learning" apparently welcomed that student with open arms. Seriously. Seriously???

But I digress...

3a. The chaos theory. Simple, quick, cool, and something that will immortalize you instantly. I can see it now "Dude!! Remember the guy who ran around the exam hall in his boxers? That was so neat, dude, dude." Limited only by your imagination, applications of the chaos theory might include : cutting the hair of the person in front of you, kicking a football around, picking a fight with your neighbour (or better, your invigilator), publicly undressing, yelling, singing, the consumption of alcohol, smuggling and eating a sandwich, trying to flood the place, bringing in a pet tiger, smashing a window, snatching and tearing to bits someone's answer script, humming, talking to the guy next to you about your relationship problems while pretending he's deaf so the entire hall hears every word you're saying (it is pretty quiet in there, you know), pitching a tent, cycling around the hall, launching your eraser into orbit using your scale, and so on and so forth.

3b. the chaos theory of fire. This, a subset of the chaos theory, includes, you guessed it, playing with fire. Burning your own script, your friends script, your friends pants, your friends hair, the invigilators pants, the invigilators hair (if any), are all included here. All you need is your zippo (which I bet is a fake that you bought in China) and an aerosol can. Alternately, a flame thrower would be nice. But I think they kinda stopped making those after the 80s.

Note: The chaos theory actually is very broad, and would cover pretty much everything you could do, or try to do, in an exam.

Some other things you could try:

4. Kill something.

5. Puking. I do not actually advise you to try this one, because it's kinda wimpy. And who names a fast food joint wimpy's anyway?

6. Sleep. This one is totally cool.

7. Wear a fancy dress. Dress up like zorro, or a clown, etc. This one doesn't even adversely affect your performance. Unless being stared at makes you nervous.

The possibilities, my friend, are endless. You are never going to have to get bored in an exam again. And that, is a promise.

Note 2: While I strongly urge you to try the above, I do not, in any form or way, condone cheating. Thats wrong. Yea. Wrong. Totally.

BB King and Gary Moore - The Thrill Is Gone.avi

The Thrill Is Gone (Live) If I could talk like a guitar (??), this is how I'd want to sound.

China Part 2

Right, as promised, here is my second post on China, only about a week late. By now, my memory has probably altered facts, and what I spew out from this point on should be taken with a pinch of pepper.

China and food
Ok, this is a tricky one. My first meal here was a McDonald's McSpicy meal. Sound familiar? Nosh!t. My last meal here was chicken pizza, with frozen mocha. Sound familiar? Nosh!t. And in between, I spent a lot of my time at "Ali Baba" the "northern Chinese Cuisine" place, where we ate .... lamb kebabs, nan, and lassi. (ok the lassi's a bit much). By this point, you probably get the drift. *its a small world after all*

Now i dont usually crib about food (or anything else for that matter, cos I'm just a neat person who doesn't complain) , but I don't generally like chicken on my bones. Yes, the "meats" in local cuisine are more bones than meat. And I'm not exaggerating; when one sees little pieces of meat, one naturally assumes they're boneless. Au contraire, some of those pieces were just bones. And why stop there, other pieces were generally cartilage based, and I even ate something which while I was spitting out I was thinking "human knuckle".

Well, that aside, the food was aight.

In keeping with my character, (I'm talking laziness and sloth today) Im just going to post a few random pictures, as I promised, and let them do the talking. if each picture is worth a thousand words, you do the math. captions under picture.

"the mystic east: china"

"beware the hun in the sun. and the sun in your face."

"am the mc during the second day. and this is the only picture i have?"

"ooh. look at me. im the tall one. in the blue tie. ooh"

"get outta my picture + peter & shuting, REAL chinese people + this time i'm not the tall one"

" jason likes it. I think zaki does too. + neeraj is 'that guy' "

" me and prof chou, the vice dean of engin. no jokes here. oh wait, my eyes are closed LOL"

"I could just eat me up. Where's my nutella?"

"eh.. art?? yup.. paint a picture and call it GRBLAROIASD"

"business......?"

" ..... or pleasure?"

Thats all for this installment folks. Thats all on China for now. And thats all from me for a while. You see, I have "exams". LOL. and I also like LOL more than lol now.

Anyway, the fatman ran 8k today. so it looks like marathon or at least half mar is still doable.

peace out.

The Big C

I just got back from China; Guangzhou to be exact. Here's my "all about China in a nutshell" post.

China and the money

Money/shopping/material goods and gain should be among your primary concerns when you visit the place. When "they" say "stuff in China is cheap," "they" mean it. In fact, the currency of China (RMB) when translated to English (by a wise sage I know) means "youre getting ripped off". So when you ask someone how much somethign is for, they reply "200 you're getting ripped off" or "250 you're getting ripped off."

The reason for this is simple; there is always someone somwhere close by willing to sell you the same thing cheaper (Cardinal Rule number one).
There is no such thing as a bottom price. nada. I'll bet if you bargain hard enough they'll pay you to take stuff off them. Well, maybe not. Then again, maybe.

I had somethign like 40 sing spending money, with which I bought the following:

• a sweeeet graphite shaft pool cue in a gnaaarly wooden case. (26 $)
• gucci cufflinks (yes, you're right, what am i going to do with those) (4 $)
• 8 gb sony flash drive. (yes, 8 fishin' geebees) (14 $)
• mao zedong posters (4 $)
• turning a corner and seeing the same stuff at half the price (priceless $$$)

China and the place

Different parts of the city look pretty different. But most of the city looks like Delhi. In fact, there were instances when I was telling the cab driver, "if you turn left and go down that street you'll hit mall road, and from there Babloo's house is within walking distance." No, I don't know a Babloo, but sometimes I wish I did.

At other times, while walking through narrow gullies to get to that particular counerfeit shop, I could swear I'd be able to turn a corner and see kids playing cricket.

The university was alright, with the highlight being the coop that sold cigarette cartons for a buck, and beers for 60 cents. No, I don't smoke, but sometimes, I wish I did. Oh, and the university had lakes. Thats right; water-body-lake things. Apparently, a lot of universities in China have lakes in them. Very interesting. yawn.

It was also pretty hazy, so I felt right at home :P

China and the people

Chinese people are fun. Well, actually, playing dumb charades for four days straight is fun. I did not have a phrase book. So, I'm sure you can imagine (I'm talking about communication, just in case you hadn't already figured it out). But yes, the delegates at the conference (yes, I went there for a conference) were interesting and receptive. Made new friends, talked to people, etc even though my Chinese is limited to Ni Hao, naka, tckika?, xie xie, and meiyo (which was the word to know, pronounced mayo, like the stuff some people eat).

On a more interesting note though, one of the clubs we went to had a bikini-clad woman dancing with a python around her.

On an even more interesting note, at the airport, a woman tried to hand us a big doll house and convince us to take it with us past customs. No, really. Doesn't everyone know that all dolls at airports are stuffed with unmentionable items. And that chocolates have diamonds hidden in them. She didn't give us chocolate though, just the dolls; so we pretty much stayed awaaay from her.

got work and am sleepy now, will post a little more on china with pictures soon. maybe.

tc

Midsem break

coming soon...

(I know.. completely ridiculous.)

will post either before or after I get back from China. uh huh, uh huh, uh huh.

Dead or Alive

Ever had one of those long days that just never seemed to end? Yea? Well me too. But I bet mine was way longer and more excruciatingly painful than yours. All blogs have this-is-what-i did-today posts, and here's mine.

Sept 8, 12 a.m.
I'm awake. Who's asleep at midnight anyway right? I don't remember what I was doing. Or maybe I don't want to tell you. Actually I was just playing curveball.

2 a.m.
I'm looking through an economics book. And I'm thinking, "When did macroeconomics become engineering math?"

3 a.m.
I am no longer flipping futile-ly through an economics textbook. I have abandoned all hope of trying to solve those crazy puzzle-things (some call them 'toots' or 'tuts'). I am resigned to my fate. In desperation, I turn to television.

4.15 a.m.
I'm thinking, "hmm... considering the fact that I have an 8 o'clock lecture that I need to attend, i should be asleep."

4.40 a.m.
I'm asleep.

7.30 a.m. - 8 a.m.
I'm awake. Two word sentences are getting annoying. I'm missing one A1 thats passing by right in front of me. I'm getting on the next A1.

8a.m. to 10a.m
I'm thinking, "geez, macroeconomics, IS engineering math reincarnated. what's going on? what am I doing here?." This quickly changes to ,"Wow thats an ugly t-shirt" or "whats the REAL meaning of life? 42's too easy" or "zzz"

10a.m. to 5 p.m.
the day passes in a blur. I'm pretty much concentrating on walking in a straight line without banging into random people. The highlight during this period is during the heat transfer tutorial when the tutor asks a question.
"Ok, who can tell me what the second condition is; in 3d it is volume, in 2d it is... anyone?"
To which I reply in a firm and unwavering, but not too overconfident and cocky, tone ,"Area!" "That is correct," replies the tutor, and all the while I'm thinking "I'm a ruddy genius"

5p.m onwards. (the weekend's here!)
Classes are over, and I'm all set to tackle the night. I start out with the band performances (at munchie), then go vote for mr. batra, who incidentally is now the president of SOIS, and whom I nominated. After which I assert my dominance over the playing field that is the Staff Club pool table. After which I "chill" with some homies and hominies. After which I watch some random movie. As you can probably imagine, by now I am no longer a person, merely the shadow of one. I am on autopilot, and nod my head to anything anyone says.


5.30 am Sept 9, 2006
Its early in the morning, but for some, like me, it is late in the day.
I lay myself down on my bed. And grant myself the gift of sleep.


oh before I sign off.. I found a random picture of gtv in march.. lt 29 i think it was (im the guy in red, and no, I don't have a hat for a face)"

It's been a lon day

What otherworldly force could make someone wake up at an unearthly hour (5ish) on a holiday, travel across the country (I love saying that about S’pore), and subject oneself to brutal physical punishment; and basically have their @$$ handed to them on a platter? While on the subject, who among us men and women is actually crazy enough to PAY for the above. I'm not really sure, but the fact is, I did it once, did it again, and now can’t seem to stop.

Well, in case you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m talking about LONs; triathLONs, AquathLONs, MarathONs and other LONS that until this juncture in time I thought only crazy people and martians took part in.

Before I launch into an endless tirade extolling the virtues of these events, and those that take part in them, I think it wise to issue a disclaimer.
“WARNING : This post may contain references to sport(s). The author cannot be held responsible for (a) the inferiority complex that WILL develop once you read this post (b) that queasy feeling some people get when someone mentions the word 'sport'. MuaHAha” Don’t say I didn’t warn you. The reason I need to make sure this disclaimer is in place is that people who read blogs and the people who are “into” sports aren’t really the same people. Confused? Refer to the figure below. Long live that Venn guy. Alternately, may he enjoy his peaceful lull, and have a great time wherever he is.

Anyhow/anywho, let me continue. Lets flash back to 2 weeks ago; the 13th of Aug to be precise. While you were sleeping, I was busy swimming, biking, and running my guts out, with nothing to motivate me except everlasting glory, and a vague idea of the size my ego would grow to after I completed my triathlon. Long story cut short, I went, I saw, I swam (500m), biked (25k), and ran (5k), before I finally conquered my first ever sprint distance triathlon. So next year, long distance tri (with even GREATER; terrifyingly, mindbogglingly ridiculous distances), here I come.

The pictures of the event are up, and mine can be accessed at the following link (can't copy here cause I haven't bought them). (warning: ever so slightly risque?) :

http://www.digilab.com.sg/cgi-bin/search8/locatepics/search.pl?q=771%20QNFABBBI&stype=AND&t=159&s=N&stpos=0

Fast forward back to today, the 2nd of September; and the New Balance Aquathlon. Yes, sprint distance, with a 750 m swim and a 5k run. With one vital difference: I hadn't gone swimming or running for about two weeks, or since the day of the triathlon to be precise. Also, I had never actually swum 750 m at a stretch. Long story cut short, I went, I saw, I killed myself swimming, then dragged my limp and lifeless corpse 5 k to the finish line. But the bottom line is I survived; which was pretty much my intention throughout.

Even though in retrospect the gift of hindsight is overrated, let us look back (or ahead, or whatever) and and try to come up with a list of reasons why people are into LONs:

• Firstly, and this is probably the most probable, people do it for the T-shirts that scream to normal people such random words and phrases as “I’m an Aquathlete!,” “Triathlete,” and my personal favourite “I ran 42.195 km for this shirt”
  
• Next, some people do it for the finishers medals. Yup, there’s a huge slab of stainless steel lying around in my room. Among some interesting uses of a heavy metal medal: I could use it to maim my enemies, bludgeon rodents and other small creatures to death, or wait, even use it as a paper weight!
  
• Ego. Self explanatory.
  
• Some people do it to try to convince the world that they aren’t the lazy slobs that they are. If they can complete a full LON, they by Jove, I guess they aren’t.
  
• Divine Intervention. Some people do it because God came to them in a dream and said unto them “Children! Give up thine slothful ways, and start anew. Swimming, then cycling, then running is the surest path to redemption, and to me, my child. May the force be with you.” Yes, I know this last one is a bit convoluted; but everyone has their reasons, and this, is mine.
  
  Until next time,
  peace out

The Chronicles of Uncle

What I have for you today is a sad story. A story about an incident that happens to everyone at some point in their lives. Yet the occurance of the incident is something that noone can ever foretell, and when it does occur, out of the blue; you look up and say, "did that just happen to me?" So weep, friends, as you read the all too famililar story of 'The Uncle Incident' (or depending on your gender, 'The Aunty Incident').

It all started one balmy summer's day in May. Most of the day passed without incident, but little did I realise that the mother of all incidents was headed my way. That evening, I walked down to the swimming pool, changed and splashed into the cool water. After swimming a few laps, beating up some people and playing around a bit, it happened. While I was wallowing in the shallow end of the pool, out of nowhere I heard a voice. The voice in itself was innocuous and innocent, that of a child not older than five; but when my brain finally comprehended what the child said, I froze. "Uncle, thoda hatna." (Uncle, please move). Uncle, I thought. Uncle. That little chit had called me Uncle. I turned around and stared at the kid with (in?) incredulous wonder. After he realised that I wasn't going to budge, he swam around me, and muttered something that sounded pretty close to "paagal uncle." (crazy uncle)

So there you have it. Little kids are calling me uncle now. I told you it was a sad story. I guess I may as well trade in my guitars and speakers for a walking stick inlaid with lapis lazuli.

But wait. Like most people who have recently graduated to uncles and aunties, I refuse to belive that I deserve the dishonor. There has to be a plausible reason why that kid called me that. I have, therefore, listed a few possibilities:

1. The kid was a member of a secret society. Most secret socities have weird question and answer thingies. For instance when the child said "Uncle, thoda hatna," maybe a member of the same society or cult would say "kyun chhotu, bade jaldi mein ho?" (Why kid, are you in a hurry?). After which the kid would promptly take me (or the person) to the cult's headquarters, where they might engage in such heinous activites as chewing gum smuggling.

2. The kid was high. I know I know, you're probably saying that children and abusive substances (is that what they're called?) don't mix, but what with television and the internet and crime on the streets and wacky role models and peer pressure, I think there's a good chance that the kid was truly gone. And, as we all know, people say and do pretty silly things when they're 'high'.

3. The kid was trying to voice activate a secret door/locker/passage in the swimming pool, and in an attempt to make the password phrase inconspicuous, that particular prhase was chosen because it had a high possibility of being used in the pool and wouldn't look suspicious when the kid said it. As opposed to abra kadabra, or open sesame, or khul ja sim sim.

4. I know this one is silly, but maybe he was just looking for a fight. OR (i just thought of this one) perhaps he wanted me to beat him up so then he could sue me! The nerve...

ok I'm out of words.

The Gift of Nag

See... this post is going to be one of those irritating annoying little 'short posts' with less words in it than you can engrave on a grain of rice (by hand, not with nanotech lasers or something) . Now, you're warned. So don't expect a long (and awesome) and winding story about some unimportant event in my life.

This is a post that promises posts in the future; good posts, awesome posts. The kind of posts that you stay up all night for, and miss classes for, and kill noisy neighbours for. Most people who read some of my awesome posts, DO stay up all night and miss classes; but going so far as to kill noisy nieghbours in order to have that perfect calm while you're reading a stormy post - now that is true and utter devotion, which by the time you read my future awesome posts, will be a trait you shall possess in no small measure.

The reason this post only promises soon-to-come awesome posts, and isn't one in itself is that I am being nagged. Yes, nagged. By a list; a to-do list to be precise. The fact is that very few to-dos on the list have actually been done. And its all annoying little stuff like send this email, order this thing, speak to that person, write this report. And I just HAVEN'T gotten around to doing that stuff/this stuff; in spite of creating the list almost 5 days ago.

Tomorrow is it I think, the day the constant nag goes away. Or at least decreases in size. It better. Cos I wouldn't want to get angry. People wouldn't like me when I'm angry. Nobody likes the Hulk when he's angry either especially people who read his blog; you see, he's not very eloquent then, and expresses himself through grunts and loud roars - beautiful prose is pretty much out of the question.

Anger.. Management..grrr

So I'm in my office right now, and I just failed my driving test. (twas bout 2 hrs ago)
Failed. After 3 years of 'learning'; I failed. (he asked me to drive around the town in reverse, who does sh*t like that)
For some reason I was just angry after failing. So livid and soo florid. I was this close "" (space between the quotes) to running over that instructor guy. Grr. I hope I don't kill the man on wednesday(restest day)

But I'm ok now. After all, how many people actually fail driving tests (in India?). Very few I'm sure. If thats not resume material, I dunno what is. After all, anything that makes one stand out is good right? HHaaanyway, hopefully this imbroglio will sort itself out on wednesday. (or i swear, that homie's gonna be pushing up daisies).
also, failing driving tests is the stuff teen movies are made of. and its kinda funny. pretty funny actually.

Havent updated blog in a while. Will do it when im back in the spore i guess. I watch cooking shows in my free time, and internet is slow at home.

Later.

Spiritually Rejuvenated

SO.. its the 1st of June and a month of hols have slipped by. By and large, its been a VERY productive period in my life. Indeed, I’ve only 4 more racers to beat in NFSMW (Need for speed: Most Wanted, for some of you suckers), after which I can add another title to the impressive list of games I’ve managed to beat. Right now, that list stands at Halo, and well… Halo.

Anywho… I just got back from my holiday (within a holiday). As you can probably surmise from the title of this entry, I just got back from Haridwar, the spiritual center of the universe, or at least Hinduism. My grandparents(dada/dadi) have a little flat in Haridwar, and it’d been a while since I saw them, so Haridwar it was. I also visited my other grandparents (nana/nani) in Bijnore, the um… crime center of the universe, or at least U.P. Haridwar was pretty neat, with all the temples, and the electricity that doesn’t go. Har Ki Pauri (“footprint of the lord”) was especially nice, and long walks along the ghats (ghaats?) were also fun. After two days of non stop fun, and a lot of holiness, and purification, in Haridwar, we went down to Rishikesh, and saw Lakshman Jhoola and Ram Jhoola (which are basically suspension bridges that have cool names). On the last day we did the usual touristy stuff like a 3 hr, 17k white water rafting expedition, and body surfing, and cliff diving from 25 ft into the frigid Ganges(during which I can proudly say I injured myself; indeed, the safety experts were puzzled when they saw torrents of crimson gush out my mouth; yeah I cut my lip or something :P). The usual touristy stuff.

But today was a spiritual experience of a different sort. My first day of work. And there I was all dressed up… and I have a big office.. and a big table.. and a computer.. and a printer.. and a phone.. yay! And there I was enjoying my shredded lamb and cherry pie and chocolate truffle on the 20th level of the Le Meridien, looking down on Rajpath and India Gate, and North Bloc and South Bloc. Nice.

In the summer time, when the weather's... fine?

WHats UP y’all?!?

Its summer again, that heavenly time of the year. The time of the year when people shed their clothes, and their inhibitions, and walk in around in all their naked glory and splendour (and you’re going, wtf/really??). That time of the year when, ya know, you’re pretty much allowed to eat all the ice cream you can stuff in your mouth, and drink all the rooafza in the fridge. (as a meaningless side note, I’m not as big a fan of rooafza as I used to be). That magical time of the year when the sweet smell of mangoes (or durians, depending on where you live) intertwines with the pungent stench of rotting garbage to assault your already confused nose.

Yep, that time of the year when there’s no bijili, no paani, and the only people loitering around outside are half baked zombies, who will soon become fully baked zombies. Them, and school kids.

Actually, summer isn’t all that bad here. My new house is pretty neat, and (I don’t mean to brag) we have bijili and paani 24/7. I mean… how luxurious. I’m practically a king. All the bijili I could want. In DelHI! In SUMMER! Omg omg. As another side note, I’m not actually a proud member of an OBC. I asked my mom, and she says we’re not as OB as I initially thought. Dang. Guess THAT changes my stance on reservations :p . Down with reservations!! So that’s that.

The advent of summer brings with it it’s own set of ‘challenges and opportunities.’ First off, is one’s attitude towards the heat. One can either stoically withstand the heat, like a war hero (or like your granddad, who apparently walked 5 k to school in sun everyday), and be like, “bah! Who needs an a.c.?” Or one can be slightly wimpier, “ Mommy it’s soooo hot, can I get some ice cream?” To which mommy replies, “of course; you’re not used to the heat, don’t go out too much, stay indoors. Here’s your ice cream;” all while dad’s sitting in a another room without bothering to put the fan on.

All in all, its good to be home. Things change, but mom and pops are the same ol’ same ol’

Adrenaline

As a self declared adrenaline junkie; I've done all of the following at least once: parasailing, bungee jumping (so what if its reverse?), skiing, aggressive inline skating, snowboarding; and have been on some of the worlds fastest roller coasters, undergone (?) free fall, climbed mountains, run races, been caught stealing for fun. Well, I'm just kidding about the last one, but you know what I'm getting at.

There is one activity, however, that is just so extreme, so totally rad, and so thrilling; that it actually makes bass jumping sit in a corner and weep. Some people call it: "Passing the parcel".
I call it: "The Circle of Death". That's right folks. Who knows what might happen when the music stops. It's like life itself comes to a standstill when the music stops; especially if Pandora's box is in your hands. I have never felt more alive. It's like your soul is intertwined with the music and pulsates with it; without the music you're just an empty hollow shell waiting with bated breath. or something.

Some "punishments" can be downright embarrassing, whilst others can exalt the "punished" to cult-like status. Like the 16 year old kid who lost the game yesterday. He will go down in the annals of history as the kid who danced to Barney's "giggly wiggly goggly woggly song," all while the video was been flashed on the big screen.

You may ask where I witnessed such a horrendous occurence. Well you probably think it was awesome if you're below the age of five. And I pray that you're older than five. From this point on, five is officially the minimum age to be able to visit this blog. Please leave if you're under five. Thank you for visiting.

As I was saying, you may very well ask where I saw the man-barney. It was somewhere in Bukit Merah I believe, I had gone there for lunch. A friend invited me for his church's Good Friday lunch. It was nice. Until the scarred-me-for-life Barney man dance.

Anyway, what followed was a short compilation of the goriest scenes from Passion of the Christ, but that was ok I guess, because noone was dressed up in a purple dinosaur suit. The church sure lost the "element of surprise" after they used the Barney dance. Otherwise I'm sure the passion would have stirred me a bit more. Man, Barney sure is creepy. So anywho, there was some more Christian stuff, after which I came home. btw.. in case you're wondering, I'm still a devout Hindu. "karma is my dharma". I love saying it the funny way. Maybe devout is pushing it, but then again, if Barney couldn't convince me, I don't think there's much else that can.

Oh and I bought my ticket for home today. whee! And I also filled up my feedback evaluation form for all the lecturers today, which is also pretty exciting if you're me. I'll leave you with a short excerpt from "who would you like to nominate for the educator award and why." The answer is my math prof CTS, and here's why:

"he's cool. i really made an effort to go for his classes. even though i missed a lot of them, the ones i did attend were pretty sweet. hes also a good tutor. he genuinely can connect with students i think. he has a great laugh that makes others crack up as well. if more lecturers were like him, classes would be awesome."

Music makes me lose control

So, its been a while huh? As the examinations loom larger (question:is that correct grammar? can examinations loom? answer: who cares?!), frequency of blog posting decreases; which is a good thing, I think. Right now my life is limited to the following: sleeping, eating, using the bathroom, studying, and, having a grand time and later feeling guilty about not studying (mostly this). So I'll keep this post short, so it will appear to me as though I'm going to go off and hit some books after, even if the probability of that happening is so slim that it would make an anorexic person look fat.

Moving on, our blog topic for the day is *rat-ata-tat-a-rat* (spinning wheel of fortune/death) : "random songs on my playlist". Yeah, thats right.. just some random songs from my playlist. I'm about to push play.. and.. here goes. *click*

• Duality by Slipknot. "I push my fingers into my eyes, it's the only thing that slowly stops the ache". What can I say to top something like that? Pure. Sheer. Brilliance. Both orignial AND oh-so-creative. Other body orifices are sooo yesterday anyway.

Canon in D by Pachelbel. Yeah thats right you insignificant nobody. I listen to classical music. So you got a problem? No? Good. Listening to classical music reflects my high IQ, not to mention increases it for short spans of time. All those of you who think EQ or some-otherQ is more important than IQ; FQ! Didn't get it? That would be beacuse of your negligible IQ; you don't have enough brains to fill an egg cup.

• More than that by The Backstreet Boys. *skip**skip* *frantically* *skip*

Fly Away by S.H.E. Here it is. Proof that music transcends all boundaries, especially one as trifling as language. The sweet riffs.. the catchy tune....and the fact that I've heard bands rehearsing this song in the club room makes it sound even better.

• High and dry by Radiohead. "Based on what you've told us so far, we're playing this track because it features mixed acoustic and electric instrumentation, major key tonality, a dynamic male vocalist, acoustic rhythm guitars and many other similarities identified in the music genome project." pandora.com ; you're officially on my list of the most kick-ass websites ever. You know my music better than I do. Dang!

Higher by Creed. Ever heard a song so many times that you don't know if you love it or detest it? Yup, I can see you nod. Well, I can't actually see you nod, but I have a very fertile imagination, so technically, I can see you nod your noggin like Noddy. Which reminds me, whatever happened to Noddy? He fell off my radar after Noddy and the Red Sports Car. Ah! those were the days. Just me and my Noddy books. HHHaaaanyway, back to higher. This was the song I perfomed for the GTV concert in March, and to prep for it, I heard the song so many times that it was soon leaking from the pores of my skin. But yeah.... I still love the song, but only on Mondays, Thursdays, Fridays, and alternate Saturdays. I really can't take the song on other days. Really.

ok.. I'm bored of typing now. I'm going to play my guitar for a while I think.

As my guitar; no, not Sitar (thats funny because it rhymes); gently weeps/screeches/hollers by Varun Varma.

The day I forgot

Well not the day I forgot, but the day I forgot.

It was bound to happen someday, and today was as good as any other. Yes people, my brain let me down. The very same brain whose calculating speeds would put a Cray XMP to shame. The same brain that has more storage space than all gmail accounts put together. Yes, I'm talking about MY brain. So... this is what actually happened.

At around 130 pm in the afternoon, I came back to my hostel after attending, and skipping, some classes. Next, I strolled down to the western food stall and ordered my usual I-can't-think-of-anything-else-to-eat food: fish and chips, tar pau. After waiting a few minutes, and picking up my food, I ambled (nay, sauntered) back to my room with not a care in the world. I lazily stretched on my bed, and decided it was time for a mid-day snooze (see.. I'm a good decision maker). zzz.

I pulled myself out of bed at around 415 and generally flopped down in front of my laptop. I started eating my fish-n-chips, which by now you can imagine are cold and not so fishy/chippy. At this point, a shiny flashing light caught my attention. "Ooh, someone sms-ed me," I thought. I opened my phone, and right there was a message from lj: "Do you know you are supposed to tend the booth today?" And my world, and all that I know, and all that is dear to me, comes crashing down. "My life is over".

I did manage to sort it out I guess; I had to apologize unreservedly to lj, and told him I was asleep and was really sorry. Which I am, of course. But really, I'm just mad that I forgot.

There are also a few other issues that I'd like to address before I end this entry.

For one, I'd like to take a second to rant about the farty chairs at YIH. "Farty chairs," you ask? It's true. Everytime someone shifts in a chair, the chairs let out a rip-roaring fart (it's like they were designed to embarrass the person sitting in the chair). This only makes the person sitting in the chair uncomfortable and shift some more; which leads to a vicious cycle, as we can see. Then again, I guess there's a reason these chairs are designed the way they are. For one, they punish fidgety people, and prevent people from shifting about. I guess this makes people sit still and just study. On second thought, I must say that it took a certain amount of ingenuity to design chairs that force people to sit still. This is a tribute to the sly b*stards who designed 'em.

Next, I'd like to take a moment to be thankful for not being afraid of lizards. Why, all of a sudden, am I bringing up the issue of lizardophobia you ask? It's because of a call I received today. At around 930, Omar calls me and says, " Oye, can you come to my room? I need a little help." "With what?" I enquire. To which he replies," ok.. this is a little embarrassing... can you come to my room and help me kill a lizard?" I would've, except I was in Yih, and sadly, had to ask Omar to turn to someone else to help resolve the.. umm.. 'situation'.

alrighty.. its time to studay..
rock on

Why I stick wid' it

Many of my friends and fellow archers will come out and tell you, straight to your face, that I am not a very good archer. Trust me, thats a euphemism. Hell, even I know that my progress has not been as quick as some of the others, and as of now I'm pretty much the tail end of the bandwagon.

There is, however, a plausible explanation as to why I persevere, and get my @ss handed to me on a platter after periodic intervals. The reasons are manifold, the more important ones being: I just can't get enough (of archery, you doofus), and, I'm simply not going to quit until I attain a level that will allow me to leave with my head high, and people bowing all around, while walking down a red carpet, being guaranteed fame, fortune and everlasting glory (a bit too far?).

Moving on, the competition this last week was actually... enjoyable. Yes, my team actually qualified for the team event, and although we got knocked out, we went down fighting, with a very decent score. What's more, I actually shot well during that event. Even during the individual round, even though I did not do as well as training, my scores weren't putrid and repungnant enough to ensure that I would be abhorred by all at that competition. Indeed, all six of us shot within a deviation of 50 points, which is quite a bit, but again, not a gaping chasm. In short, I was relatively happy for the first time after a competition. And I want that again. And the next time, I'm going to do even better.

Confession

There's something I have to tell you. You may want to sit down for this. You sitting? No? ok up to you. You ready? ok. here goes: I laugh at lame jokes.

At this point you're probably wondering... 'wth'. Well, just hear me out. This isn't the 'jeez-thats-so-lame' laugh. I actually find the lame, silly jokes that people here can't get enough of funny. But I hold the laughter in. Well, actually I just try to hold it in, until I no longer can, following which I make either a rattling kk-khh sound (you know, like when those dementor things are about to suck a soul out) or a weird suppressed giggle sound (you know, like when you suppress a giggle).

So there it is. I laugh at jokes that other people think aren't funny. Now that doesnt mean that I dont have a sophisticated sense of humor, and lack panache or am a complete goofball. I also completely dig sarcam, irony, slapstick , wry witty humor, not to mention dead baby jokes.

After making that confession, I also want to make a resolution to laugh out loud at anything I think is funny. So the next time I burrst out laughing while you're rolling your eyes, and making a face, either join in the fun, or ignore me :p

so, one day these two atoms were walking down the street, and one of them says to the other. "Dude, I think I just lost an electron". The other atom asks, "are you sure?" To which the original atom replies, "yea, I'm positive."

Mid sem broke, and bingo weak

So it's 123o pm, and I have a test in about 48 hours. I also have a tutorial due in 12. havent prepared for either. And here I am, blogging and listening to Altamont SuperHighway revisited by Apollo ChaarSauChalis (440 for you losers who cant count in hindi).

Holy Shii'iiite.

It's been a really fun last two weeks. (word!). There's been the beach, the airshow, the archery stuff, the src drunken night, the boat quay even-more-drunken night, the oasis concert, jarhead, the new electric guitar.
The NEW ELECTRIC GUITAR.
woohoooo!! ibanez, jet black, and a bunch of shiny knobs. halen, here i come.



Then there was also Bingo weak. Oh, week. Well, the former is more politically correct :p. But that was so long ago that I've quite forgotten.

And, oh.. I also got my laptop back. yay! And life is good again.
And I'm also going back home for summer. yay!

yeah yeah yeah .
tarang was good. the ntu singer was pretty good, and pretty good.
oh and pop tarts are neat. they are a bit on the expensive side though.
now we're getting trivial aren't we? while we're at it... I need to figure out some way of cleaning my water bottles so that they don't smell strange and stale.

life is good. in general. you know... the i'm-glad-to-be-alive-thing.

but... and here it comes: i gotta study.

Week three

Week three.Thats when they begin. Tutorials. And life is never the same again. Well, at least for a few weeks.

Also, its mad season again. Internship time. I'm drafting my cv right now; and will probably have applied to my first batch of companies by the end of this week. It's been a really busy week, even though I haven't been doing a terrible amount of work. I'll lagging terribly in my academic classes. The plan is to catch up over this CNY break. Gong Ci Fa Cai to all you lunar new year celebrators. Archery tomorrow morning at 8 if I can wake up.

I wonder.. don't weblogs get boring when they are filled with mundane things-i-did-today posts. And that's how this blog has been getting lately.

Next Wednesday I will be going down to see this public speech being delivered by our very own, APJ Abdul Kalam. Should be something.

Note to self: Priority one is academics. Always. That's something I've been ignoring in college I think. Not acoustica, archery, sport, marketing. Remember.

grandee signing off.

The clock

Our internal clock, the bod-dee clock , is a wonderful, terrible thing. When set correctly, it allows the setter to rise at a reasonable time, and remain fresh and boppy throughout the day. On the other hand, a clock that's out of whack... well that's a rather different story. And yes, my bc is out of whack. And yes, I'm out of whack.

Sleeping at 3 (early) and waking up at 1(pm)... missing lectures, or attending them in a really zombified state. I missed archery training this morning.. bleah. Waking up late can be fun, but in the long run, it's just painful; you wake up and half the day is gone. You also feel lazy and sleepy throughout the day. I set my alarm(S) for around 7 or 8 am every morning... but no alarm can rouse me.. really.

Ah well.

Apart from that, its been a good week for everything except acad I think. Been feeling good all week for no particular reason. Archery is much better. Guitar is fine. Club work is pretty great, and I guess I really like being in charge.

Now I need to turn my life around. The target: to have a regularish body clock by CNY, and not miss any more lectures.

New Year!

Holy Cow Batman!
Its the new year! OMG! Thats..like... so totally awesome..totally! WORD!

This is my first post after an interim of almost half a year! Wheee!
A lot has happened.. but wheeeee.. who cares? It's the new year. Wheeee!

So I'm in a quandary. A dilemma. A something. I can't figure out for the love of me whether I want to keep updating this blog. A part of me wants to just forget about it, and this other part of me... (I think it's my pancreas) wants me to push on and never give up and keep striving and push my faculties of body and mind furthter (farther?) than any man and attain a new level of nirvana.... pish-posh... and basically post regularly.

It's like the Hamlet super-debate/soliloquy. "To be or not to be, that is the question. Whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows.." and so on.

Bee- Aai- Enn - Gee- Oh , and Bingo was his name-o.